tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8701114292967665697.post2559824975997853196..comments2024-03-06T06:00:00.509-08:00Comments on plufrompdx: PetulantUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8701114292967665697.post-76755850512107930892009-10-24T12:18:10.562-07:002009-10-24T12:18:10.562-07:00I just found your blog through Grumpy Granny. OMG!...I just found your blog through Grumpy Granny. OMG! It is like reading my life story here. lol Same issue....I'm done and she is just starting with the menopause. Went to the GYN last week and they offered her a patch and gave her samples. She has to wait till the blood test results come back before she can start them though. I have my fingers crossed! If it works I will pass the info on. Great read! Will add you to my Google Reader. :~DDarlenehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04878793245709280652noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8701114292967665697.post-4303337409813970762009-10-06T12:28:08.044-07:002009-10-06T12:28:08.044-07:00I have no advice for you. I know this is a common...I have no advice for you. I know this is a common thing, this ebb and flow of a long term sex life, but I am with you, it needs to be more often. That intimacy is important. It sets apart different relationships, especially woman to woman. She must miss it too?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8701114292967665697.post-2942623081353694942009-10-06T09:54:36.724-07:002009-10-06T09:54:36.724-07:00I've been there, and its very frustrating for ...I've been there, and its very frustrating for everyone and really hammers your self-esteem at the same time. <br />My experience was - while I craved the sex and was very physically attracted to my GF - what I really wanted more than anything was the intimacy. So, we worked on touching and kissing and massaging and that seemed to help. It made a difference in my self esteem, if not my horn-dogness.<br />FOr what its worth - sex does matter in relationships, it is important and you are not being petulant for wanting a full sex life that satisfies you.<br />Lesbian bed death - arrrgggh!!!LissaGhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17989056883350184939noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8701114292967665697.post-50214671135230139062009-10-01T15:20:04.095-07:002009-10-01T15:20:04.095-07:00Thanks for all of the great suggestions! It's...Thanks for all of the great suggestions! It's a struggle, to be sure, finding a balance that both partners like. I don't like feeling like a horn-dog, and I really don't think I am!<br /><br />Let's see ~ salmon for dinner tonight, no tv, snuggle on the couch, a micro-snog and schedule one for next week. I'm in business!ehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07477806052578880686noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8701114292967665697.post-2692723946107478412009-10-01T12:45:59.644-07:002009-10-01T12:45:59.644-07:00Start feeding her lots of salmon, carrots, broccol...Start feeding her lots of salmon, carrots, broccoli, red meat and zinc...to surreptitiously boost her testosterone levels. <br /><br />I was once in a relationship where I had been duped about libido too, its a hard hard road!Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04494869781168359179noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8701114292967665697.post-75165489052931748212009-10-01T08:02:25.971-07:002009-10-01T08:02:25.971-07:00Martha and I have been going through very similar ...Martha and I have been going through very similar conflicts in libido. I recognize everything you are saying. I am definitely more sex oriented right now while Martha is going through swings which I also believe to be hormonal. Months could go by without her having any interest and than maybe there would be a few days of willingness. I say "willingness" because I don't think she is particularly sex driven during those times. Just doesn't have an objection. (Not exactly ego boosting for me)<br /><br />For a long time I think I put too much pressure on her which had the exact opposite response of what I was hoping for, she just withdrew further. But then I realized that much of my need was not sex, per se, but the need for intimacy. And I talked to her about that. I was very honest in my feelings and told her I really needed to be held, and that in lieu of sex, would it be possible for some lower level intimacy. I gave her some suggestions as to what I was hoping for - kissing the back of my neck, caressing a breast, a thigh, etc. - for just a few minutes before sleep or upon waking. And this seems to have acheived a good compromise for us. She does not feel presure to do something she does not feel like doing, I am getting at least some physical affection, we both enjoy some shared intimacy without pressure, and sometimes (not as often as I'd like) these gestures wind up turning into more. <br /><br />I am hopeful that when we are safely through menopause, we will return to a more "normal" routine. But we have found a way to meet half way that we can both live with until the next chapter begins. And really, half way is better than nothing at all.8thdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17139355263412766126noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8701114292967665697.post-83401528310432568612009-10-01T07:43:47.294-07:002009-10-01T07:43:47.294-07:00People who say sex isn't important in a relati...People who say sex isn't important in a relationship need to get laid. hehehe. I think it's very important so I can imagine it's gotta be incredibly frustrating to be with someone you lust after who just isn't in the mood.<br /><br />Try quickie sex for a while. Maybe if T thinks that sex will only be 5 minutes, she'll warm up to it more and that will lead to a longer session here and there. While 5 minutes is not exactly ideal, it's better than nothing.<br /><br />Tell her, you just want a few minutes. Ask her to put out just for that. You might find, after a few weeks of quickies, she will be the one wanting more.ebhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03420158428882932160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8701114292967665697.post-65970431825731580812009-09-30T14:50:09.286-07:002009-09-30T14:50:09.286-07:00I can imagine that it's not easy for you. Of c...I can imagine that it's not easy for you. Of course it messes with your self esteem and it isn't fair to you that she isn't making sex more of a priority. Perhaps you should consider coming up with a schedule, I know it sounds awful but it could really help. You never know. Best of luck.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8701114292967665697.post-49884313099433532192009-09-30T14:49:02.951-07:002009-09-30T14:49:02.951-07:00get her hormones checked. menopause can wreak havo...get her hormones checked. menopause can wreak havoc on sexual desire.<br />also ...turn off the TV. <br />:)weesehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15618625306145677343noreply@blogger.com