16 June 2011

The News

Well, it ain't good.

Stage 4, spread across the midline to both lungs, metastasized to the adrenal and lymphatic systems.  Surgery is not an option, radiation is not an option, and the oncologist doesn't think that chemo will be worth the risk.  The chemo won't significantly increase the length of her life, and will make her sick and weaker which could, in fact, shorten what time she has left.

And, what time does she have left?  He wouldn't give an estimate but said it would be measured in months rather than years.

I'm not ready to lose my mom.  Obviously I don't have a choice about that.  My choice is to see her every day and spend as much time as I can with her.

Damn.

6 comments:

greg said...

My heart goes out to you. I am so very sorry for you, your mother and your family. I'll be thinking of you and wishing you strength. xoxo

8thdayplanner said...

I have no words. But I will share your tears. And hold you, and your mom, very gently in my heart.

You know where to find me if you want to talk. Or have tea.

the only daughter said...

ditto the comments made. if i were in the position to offer a tea date, it'd be offered.

peace.

Grumpy Granny said...

I send you hugs and a virtual shoulder to lean on any time. Be with her, hug her, touch her, tell her how much you love her. Your presence with her will be the best gift you can give. And should you need to get away later, our porch is here for you.

Love and light,
GG

eb said...

Dammit. That sucks. Murderers and child rapists get to live but your mom has to die. That's what I thought when my mom died. It's fucked up bullshit. But it's the way it is. I hope you can find as many pockets of peace in what will be a very difficult journey ahead. Be there, share stories and try to savor every moment - the good and bad. xoxo

weese said...

i've just been through this.
i understand completely.
be present.
peace.